Live: Sometimes, life gets to me. Not in the sense that life is rough and tough, but that life is passing; life never stops. You keep getting older, you are experiencing. It is not that you will experience (but you will), or that you did experience (because you did), but that at every moment of every day you experience. That is life.
Along those same lines, the process, idea, and fact of death scares me. I don't know if I'm merely more aware of life in general, but I feel like death happens so much and it never gets easier. I have so many instances in my life where death is so near, that I do my best not to think about it. I have friends at war, and it scares me to know that each and every day they put their lives out there. I have relatives that, lets just face it, are drawing near the end (we could all be a lot closer than we think). And the part that brings me to tears every time I think about it is that I have people in my life that are so close to me, such a part of my life, that I can't imagine living without them. Honestly, I couldn't. Gah! I hate it. Not the closeness, but the vulnerability. I hate that I have to let life happen, and to know and trust that God is sovereign over all. I don't think that God puts pain in our lives to show us about Him, but that God puts pain in our lives so that we can have complete Faith and Hope in Him alone.
What brought this "Debbie Downer" of me? Well, the pastor at the church we are currently attending went to speak at a memorial service for this lady that he knew; read about it here. And, so I was facebook stalking and reading through his blog about this lady, and then I read through her blog (yeah, the one about her cancer and how she was fighting), then I read through her husbands blog. Oh man. I bawled my eyes out. It made me think. Read it for yourself, it is really powerful. This is also a tribute to her (if you haven't checked out anything else, then this you must read!)
Love: I love the fact that my Mom, and Aunt, and Grandma are coming out see us this week. Period. I don't want them to ever leave.
Laugh: This one has been a long time coming.... and I'm way too worn out to tell the whole story.... but basically I took a dog out to poop that we were watching, completely unaware that the back to my yoga pants had been chewed off by that very dog. My derriere was exposed to anyone and everyone. Wonderful. I didn't feel a breeze (was there one?), and the dog did not notify me that the crotchel area of my pants was delicious. If you don't laugh at that... I'm at a totaly loss.
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